Personally, I never liked the whole dating thing. It’s like paying to be interviewed when you don’t even know if you want the available position. Traditional etiquette makes it impossible for anyone to act like him/herself. You make eye contact but not for too long; try to be funny without being silly; And eat finger foods with a knife and fork. Most of the time, the guy is going through the motions in hopes that his efforts turns in to sex and the girl is counting down the dates until the two can have sex and she won’t seem…. you know. Or conversely, one person is looking for a life-long mate and the other is just trying to fill up a Saturday night.
So has the internet killed dating?
Sites like eharmony.com, chemistry.com, match.com, myspace.com, facebook.com, The Roundups, and adultfriendfinder.com(if you’re naughty) have made the awkward stage of dating fairly non-existent.
Major Pro of the internet. If you don’t like some ones online personality, you can easily ignore them and go to the next contestant. It’s the ultimate speed date. Con: even with video messaging you know very little actual provable information about the person at the other end of the laptop. Pro: By the time two internet daters actually meet, they are well acquainted and adequately comfortable with each other. Con: A “could be” meaningful relationship is on fast forward and burns out rather quickly. Pro: A “could be” waste of time relationship is on fast forward and burns out rather quickly.
So….. in today’s super high paced society, is the internet the next phase of dating or is it the death of the old school art of courting?
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on Jul 20th, 2009 at 12:04 pm
The internet has definitely streamlined the dating process and even goes back to the days when BlackPlanet reigned supreme. Online presence cut out the clutter, you were attracted to the person because of the look just the same as if you met them on the street. You learn more about the person by looking over their profile or simply dropping questions in there inbox. Instead of wasting time and money (we’re in a recession ppl) going to the movies or out to eat you get right to the good stuff.
For the 80s babies and prior generations dating is still living but for 90s and above it’s dead.
on Aug 15th, 2009 at 9:47 am
Wow, I am so sorry that you feel that way. Not an uncommon sentiment of men, but unfortunate nonetheless. I think that sometimes men put too many restrictions or misconceptions on what “Dating” means. I am down for a walk in the park, chatting over an ice cream cone or whatever. It doesn’t have to be this big production to include dinner, etc., especially in the beginning as that is definitely too much pressure - on both parts. We (women) are being scrutinized as much as much as y’all are.
I think that internet vs face to face is just a realty that we face for many interactions (not just dating) in this day and age. One just has to find it in themselves to investigate what type of relationship they are seeking and the investment (time, etc. - not $$) that they are willing to make.
You said “in hopes that his efforts turns in to sex…” If that is all you seek, let it be known from the get go. If you seek more, then don’t treat that woman differently after you do get the goods. It is all about being up front and communicative. Sorry this doesn’t delve more into the internet vs in person, but rather about the core issues behind dating. We too want this to be a fun experience and not a labor in love